Have you noticed how many ‘assholes’ there are today? Or is it just me? The driver next to you on the freeway flipping you off as you merge. Isn’t that your right? The girl at the check-out stand, having forgotten she gets paid to assist customers, who is having a bad-attitude-day, glaring discriminating expressions at you for taking up her time. The resentful and discourteous answering service who takes your information-seeking call, communicating in short, curt, demeaning sentences. Seems like it’s rampant. Could even be your partner or spouse. I feel we are dealing with a very heavy virus, an Asshole Virus that’s taken our nation by storm. I feel we need to address this pandemic disease and discern the best possible remedies and solutions.
I realize I might be offending some people by calling a spade a spade. In a world of being politically correct about absolutely everything, stating the truth gets side-swiped. Saying a person is an asshole is rather harsh, however can be most apropos. If it’s true, it is. Saying otherwise is less than the truth. It is important to note, being an asshole does not come under the same umbrella as a dumb-ass or a smart-ass. A dumb-ass is one who is limited in their ability to utilize their intelligence. A smart-ass can make other’s laugh with their cynical brilliance. An asshole is just plain unkind, mean and disparaging.
A fabulous client and friend was the one who brought this issue to my attention in full regalia. She was extremely upset about her husband. I don’t know if she knew how direct and insightful she was when she told me her story about her husband’s malady.
“He’s either on drugs and we can get him treatment and back to being healthy. Or he’s depressed and we can put him on drugs to get him well. Or he’s just a plain asshole with no cure and I have to figure out what to do??” It was then I realized, all too clearly, we are dealing with an epidemic, a virus of aggressive, unhappy behavior- individuals who like to throw people into their path of destruction, mincing them up with acidic and contemptible aggression. One of the most noticeable symptoms of the Asshole Virus is, ‘No one deserves to feel happy if I don’t’.
The underlying truth is, it is a far more perplexing an illness than realized on the surface. The remedies for this antagonistic and insidious virus are also more complicated. In a world where personal responsibility is a bit dicey, surreal and disguised, this virus has had the ability to really take hold in our psyches and lower our natural inclinations of goodness and weaken our immune systems of integrity.
If you know individuals or loved ones who are poisoned with this shrewd disease -as shrewd it is, I’ve complied a list of antidotes. These disrespectful viral conditions have become tolerated in our interactions with one another – not cool. What happened to good principles, honesty and honor? Now is the time to change the toxic environment, heal wounds, regain vitality and positive attitudes, eradicating the Asshole Virus, similar to smallpox, measles and mumps. If that’s possible, then so is this.
1. A Cup of Awareness. Awareness is king. Sometimes individuals become so self absorbed in their own demise, awareness of the world around them becomes hindered, obstructing their abilities to understand and care for other people. In sharing awareness of said bad behavior, offers the afflicted room to grow, change and deal with what is.
2. Homeopathic Remedy of Communication. Communication gets lost in the barrage of bad behavior, where lines of demarcation are drawn in anger, words of warring and disrespect become the norm. What’s missing? What is really the issue? Suggest taking time to really uncover the buried and sometimes convoluted issues which created the behavior, allowing the virus to take over the system. Communicate with patience and love.
3. Vitamins of Support. People are grumpy because they don’t feel well. This is amplified with the Asshole Virus. The body can be tired, weak, achy and just plain drained. Good basic vitamin and mineral support can help eliminate the symptoms, supporting the system. Think the basics: Vitamin C – lots of it for immunity, B’s for stress, D for happiness, minerals for cellular, organ and bone support. Add in good nutrition and the symptoms will improve quickly.
4. Hydration of the Heart. Individuals are assholes because they are not happy within. It’s pretty simple really. When we are happy, we are good to others. When we feel overwhelmed, depleted and despondent, it’s much easier to allow negative emotions to rule. Suggest emotional heart support; extra love, touching, more love. It opens up the heart center, hydrating the arid-ness which has befallen the emotional core; again another symptom of the virus. Invite good friends and family to share in the love-fest: goodness begets goodness and hearts expand.
5. Cleansing the Patterns Human behavior is often based on patterns we have developed based on environment, familial expectations, society and friends. These patterns can be extremely toxic and destructive; addictions, attitude, sabotage, anger, resentment, OCD, – the list goes on. We all have them in some form. When we recognize poor, bad rampant repeating cycles, it’s time for deep cleansing. This can be accomplished using the remedies listed, amplified with clear concise communication combined with emotional and mental discipline to recognize the old offenders. Every time a mis-patterning behavior arises, change it with new perception and action. This improves the immune system, cutting off the stranglehold of the Asshole Virus.
6. Toxic Flush Humanity and all life forms have become toxic. Literally. We are swimming in mercury, arsenic, cadmium, lead, aluminum, Thimerosal found in vaccines, etc. It impacts our brains, attitudes, cells and vitality. The toxicity can burden behavior more than the medical establishment is willing to address. Flushing the system of heavy metals is a wise choice. Chlorophyll is a natural chelator; it gathers toxins in the cells and helps to rid the body of the impurities. Zeolite also chelates metals and radiation. If someone is heavily afflicted by the Asshole Virus, it could be amplified by heavy toxins in the system. A steady flush is recommended.
7. Rebuilding the Machine To improve natural immunity to bad behavior requires redirection of attention. Focus on enjoyable exercise which builds muscle and bone strength. Breathing fresh air improves stamina, eliminating fatigue and drowsiness. Physical activities improve at a core level, our self esteem. When self esteem and confidence rise, the ability of the Asshole Virus to stay active within our psyches’ diminishes tenfold. Joining other participants creates space for positive relationships, again neutralizing the virus.
8. Calming the Mind, Reassessing Stress Stress is the number one factor behind illness. Of course there are multiple support factors which also supply the body/mind with toxicity, however stress is the number one emotional component. Find the specific stressful basis and be willing to adjust attitudes and perceptions around the ’cause’. This is the first step. Next is the ability to focus on calming the mind, finding, seeing and sensing peace in all the earthly beauty from blue skies to children’s laughter. Perhaps it’s time to suggest to the patient, meditation, trying yoga. Find the Asshole sufferer a crystal, inviting them to intentionally send stressful situations and people to the gem, transmuting the emotional and mental anxieties with love and light. This relaxing of the mind, strengthens the overall body, improving immune health, eradicating the Asshole Virus from the emotional, mental and physical bodies.
9. Creating a New Environment/Strategy. Possibly the time has arrived, even imperative, for change. A new job, a new living arrangement, a different relationship. If the end of the rope is imminent, yet the courage to make the leap is lacking, the Asshole Virus has the ability to really set-in and take over behavior, making the situation even more dire. Strongly suggest changing the scene/environment is healthy and well deserving. Offer encouragement – in other words, literally sending courage to the sufferer to transform their position. Change is an immune fortifier, even if it feels awkward, scary and challenging.
10. Peaceful Warrior If you are one of the unlucky recipients of Asshole Virus behavior, *standing impervious to destructive antics, *defining boundaries, *offering love while being firm about acceptable and unacceptable accountability, is strong medicine for the patient. Your mirror can be the transformative reflection needed. When offered with love and fortitude, this hearty remedy can really instigate and refresh in the individual what is most important. Your love and support – or the lack thereof? The choice is offered.
And when all else fails, Preparation H, works wonders.
Cosmic sunshine to you!
Wow, Candia, were you MAD or what! I’m so happy you vented, and even happier that you offered some solutions for dealing with our virus! I hope you receive some Cosmic sunshine today.
Actually it really wasn’t about me, ironically. I have had a family member I feel who’s been ‘down’ with the ‘virus’ (wink wink) but in reality I see it in the people I work with and their lives. I wanted to write something funny, about how people treat each other without even considering the impact it delivers. It’s about emotional responsibility, I feel. I wanted to write it in a different way – a cosmic twist if you will. Sorry if you thought I was mad….I’m not at all. 🙂
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Don’t forget: the Personality Enema. Flush light and love (through a day or two at the spa) all inside yourself, and come out a completely different person.
Brilliant Caelan, I love it. A fabulous addition to the remedies. Thanks for your insight and input.