We live in a world of mixed messages, religious dogmas, political ideologies, societal biases and familial structures. Discovering the real you buried under the deeply layered external pressures can be a bit trying however with foresight and perseverance it can be done.
My cousin divorced her husband several years ago. In doing so, she realized her musical tastes were either her dad’s or her former husband’s. She didn’t know what she thought about politics yet alone religion or spirituality. Her food choices were not her number one preferences. She discovered through her journey that most of her beliefs were based on what others had taught her to believe rather on what she felt to be true within herself. Her divorce and subsequent time alone, helped her carve her own spirited pathway, leading her into academia.
That’s probably the case more than we know. We take on others beliefs rather than taking time to really ferret out what makes our heart full and glad. The bottom line is it’s easier to “follow” rather than to “forge.”
At this time of year, when we are bombarded with holiday overdose combined with the darkening of the days, those opposite juxtaposing forces are a wonderful platform for us to really identify what we believe in. What our truths are. What we hold within our deepest cellular matrix, within our hearts to be true just for us. Not someone else’s belief, or religion or political preference. Ours and ours alone.
Then stand up to them, those beliefs, your truths. Hold them near and dear to your soul as they will guide you on your journey across the stars.
Everyone deserves their own truth. And they of course are right.
Cosmic sunshine to you.
"Isle of View" 
maybe this will help
1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It’s rare … you cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It’s not as if you’re going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It’s a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It’s later than you think. It’s Christmas!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That’s the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they’re made with skim milk or whole milk. If it’s skim, pass. Why bother? It’s like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people’s food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year’s. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don’t budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They’re like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you’re never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don’t like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it’s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10. One final tip: If you don’t feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven’t been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:
“Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “WOO HOO what a ride