I’m wearing a pink-glow-in-the-dark wrist band today. It was a gift from a young bald woman at the oncologists’ who was sharing gifts and smiles. Her challenge: breast cancer. She couldn’t have been more than in her early thirties, far too young to be dealing with cancer. Yet here she was, smiling, laughing and telling tales. What a bright spot she was in the office. Pink by the way, is the color of love. It symbolizes the juncture in the heart half way between the red root chakra and the white crown chakra. The perfect color to awaken people’s hearts, awareness and empathy.
I’ve learned a great deal over the last two years about cancer. I’ve learned even more about the emotional roller coaster created from the diagnosis. It’s the full gamut of feelings from denial, depression, grief to acceptance. The “Why me?” question rings like an undercurrent throughout the chemo rooms.
As the spouse, the care giver, and ultimately the healer, I’ve had to take a backseat to the process. Sometimes the best course of action is none at all. I’ve literally had to “lay it all down” and walk away, opting instead to “be there” for my husband with no cajoling, no diet restrictions, no admonishment for not staying abreast of the vast amount of supplements, not requiring exercise. Literally not doing any of my “healings.”
It’s been strange. Seriously. Every time I’ve had him “clear,” in remission, for whatever ailment was on the docket, another would be created. I finally had this “ah-ha” moment that said, out loud and clearly, “this isn’t your job.” There’s a much bigger story going on. I had a client remark that didn’t speak well of my abilities, my practice. The larger truth is not everyone wants to be healed. Not everyone can be healed as there are larger chronicles waiting to be written and acted out. Karma at its finest.
Trust me. From my place ~ and I’m such a “fix it” kind of gal, that stepping back doesn’t come easily for me. Part of my lessons ~ step out of the driver’s seat and let life unfold. Let the control go basically. Whew! So difficult especially with someone you’ve loved and shared your life.
Sitting at the oncologists and speaking to others who are challenged by cancer has also opened my eyes to travails seen through the lens of allopathic medicine, the “bennies” (benefits) and pitfalls. My husband has now dealt with as the sideline of chemo, ulcers, nausea, gout, blodo clots in his lungs and now extremely low white blood cells. He virtually has no immune system. They’re killing him to save him as you’ve heard me say before. I have great empathy for him and everyone being subjected to the ramifications and virtual death sentence of cancer. I have deep compassion for the overwhelming costs on the families and loved ones. The impact is enormous. In the U.S. one in three is now expected to have/get cancer. (Truth: we all have cancer in our bodies. It depends on the emotional, mental and physical backgrounds, genes, DNS, diet, exposure to toxins, chemicals, etc as to whom will have it activated.) Something has got to shift sooner than later. The U.S. has one of the highest cancer rates. Why is this? My opinion ~ our fuel sources, our foods. Too much garbage and not enough substance coupled with heavy toxins. A lethal dose as verified by the rise in the medical and insurance companies across the states.
My invitation~ next time you see someone bald from chemo or has blisters from radiation, reach out to them, smile, say hello. Help them gain back some of their humanity. So much is stripped of their essence, their personalities, through the burgeoning therapies. It’ll make their day and fill your heart full of goodness.
And goodness goes a long way, a very long way. Here’s to pink, and every other color in the rainbow.
Cosmic sunshine to you.