Over the past two months I’ve been buried, preoccupied and otherwise swamped in a learning curve of quick and vast proportions. It’s been an interesting ride sitting in my husband’s chair” at the helm of his once thriving electrical business. Due to his cancer, the business suffered. This is what I’ve inherited. On top of losing my partner, I’ve been dealing with a floundering company filled with opposite personalities, no additional personnel (Calling all licensed electricians, I need your help!) alcoholism in a key employee, a power trip in another, high ADD in another, emotional out breaks in another, diminished sales and jobs. I’ve a few stalwart defenders of the realm I couldn’t do without so as of this moment the ship is still afloat. I call in Dale, my hubby on a regular basis to help out with this crazy sparked electrical labyrinth and construction maze.
This has afforded me little time for my world, my business. I’ve asked the universe a few thousand times, what is my purpose in all this chaos, the daily crises, the enormous stress. I feel I have the answer. The reason I’m sharing is perhaps this too will assist you with the transits and squares and trines and retrograde everything that is influencing us, pushing us, cleaning up our personal debris for a lighter, higher personal location in the cosmos. Or you can tell me I’m nuts and this is normal.
I don’t believe so. I believe we are part of a vast network of intelligence, energy, consciousness. We have just been disconnected for millennia. When we are out of sync with universal principles, well shit oh dear! We fall from “grace.” Sitting in Dale’s chair I picked up his fear, his destructive worry, caught in his web of anxiety and knee-jerk reactions, his need to solve the next problem. (No wonder he had cancer from the stress of the emotional roller coaster.) I was channeling him. Every time I’ve released these emotions, settled into, “All is perfect in the world, it is what it is,” aligned with my higher self, relaxed and am grateful, miracles have happened. Now mind you it’s always at the Twelve Hour, but they have continued for the last six months. And at several last minute moments when I was ready to close the doors a knight in shining electrical gear arrived at my doorstep. This is far beyond the one or two times, but is now in the dozens and dozens of rescues. It’s simply amazing. It’s kept me completely in the “present” moment as there has been no room for other contemplations. I believe the lesson for me, as for all of us, is divine trust combined with relaxing into the situation and knowing no matter how it looks, is perceived, it’s just a moment, it’s just an illusion, for there is no death, no separation, no good or bad just a continuation of the process.
For example, if the company succeeds or closes, it’s all in divine design. I know, no matter what, I’ve given my best. It’s not good or bad in either direction, it just is. This week is another deciding factor. My go-to has been silence, quiet internal time to ask, explore, sit, focus and listen to inner guidance. I did that today by choosing to work away from the office in the quiet and peace of the woods. In alignment I plain-ass feel better.
Dealing with the loss of a partner is one life hurdle. Working through a business not of my choosing another. Everyday I’m diligent in approaching it from what I know is true. Everything is connected, everything is energy. How appropriate being in the “electrical” world.
As for Dale’s communications, I believe he’s helped with the twelfth hour rescues. He also continues to mess with my music. Yesterday as I was driving, I heard “A Case of You” by Joni Mitchell seven times. A new song would begin, then it’d hop right back to Joni. Or I’d nearly finish a song then yep, back to “A Case.” That was till I finally told him to knock it off, then my iTunes settled into normal rhythm. Still yet the comedian.
Lyrics from “A Case of You,”
“I remember that time you told me you said
“Love is touching souls”
Surely you touched mine
‘Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time.
Oh you’re in my blood like holy wine
You taste so bitter and so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you darling
And I’d still be on my feet
I’d still be on my feet.
J. Mitchell, 1970
To being in grace, relaxed and grateful and still on my feet.
Cosmic sunshine to you.